life works in mysterious ways

I am rethinking my whole life and the paths I am taking are being turned upside down. So weird for me to actually admit to myself that what I am doing right now isn't what I know I need. Champlain? I don't even know anymore. I am going with my heart and doing what I feel I need to do for the happiest future. That pretty much means not going back to Champlain. My career path is headed in a Marketing/Advertising direction, but I know that I do not want to life in or around a city which I would most likely have to if I continued with it and got a job eventually in that field. I want to help people and make them happy and realize the beauty in themselves and in life. I want to live somewhere surrounded by nature nature nature. Champlain is draining me in the finance department and I know that the courses offered aren't nearly as extensive and interesting as the ones offered at UMass Amherst which I could go to for less than half the price of Champlain because I recieved free tuition. My education will be much better and I would save money it's what I need to do. Vermont changed me in so many ways and I would never take back anything I learned or experienced in the past year at Champlain, but it's time for me to move on and work towards my happy perfect future. Doing this makes me feel like I have control over my life and I am happy with my decisions. Now telling my friends is going to be most excruciating. Help!

And I miss Nick; talking to him for hours on end everyday is necessary to keep me sane, but it's driving me to insanity at the same time not being able to touch him, and see the reassurance in his eyes, and kiss him, and walk around on the beach with him in the middle of the night, and play with him and fight with him and be just happy with him. august can't come soon enough.

Work starts tomorrow at Senior Aerospace. My orientation for Bertuccis is tomorrow evening so hopefully I'll be starting there soon as well. And the 26th is my first babysitting day at Elite and I am looking forward to getting back to the gym. Goo, let's see how I can hold up working 3 jobs.

VW GTI here I come!